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You might look at other people and see them as confident, but despite your experience and successes, you still doubt yourself at times.
In this conversation with Tara LaFon Gooch, 2X bestselling author and TEDx speaker, she shares her perspective – confidence is not a personality trait, it is a practice. It is not something you are born with, it is something you build.
We explore why so many capable leaders chase success, when in fact, success is the byproduct of confidence. When confidence increases, competence is perceived to increase, trust strengthens and opportunities follow.
This is not about projecting arrogance. It is about building self-trust. If confidence has ever felt elusive to you, this episode will give you practical ways to start.
What you will learn in this episode:
- Why confidence is learnable, not innate
- Tara’s GRASP framework for sustainable confidence
- How gratitude strengthens self-belief and leadership presence
- The link between confidence, trust and perceived competence
- Why small compounded action creates sustainable change
- How environment and purpose influence your level of confidence
Confidence is not for everyone else. It is available for you too.
Tara LaFon Gooch, MBA, is the CEO of Best Branding Solutions, a 2X bestselling author, international TEDx speaker, and host of the GRASP Confidence podcast, a top-ranked personal development show for leaders and high performers. Known for her GRASP Method (Gratitude, Responsibility, Action, Sight, Purpose), Tara helps leaders, speakers, and entrepreneurs build authentic confidence, expand their influence, and step boldly into their purpose.
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Episode overview:
Confidence is not a Personality Trait, it is a Practice
Confidence is one of those qualities that I hear people talk about as if it belongs to someone else. You walk into a room, you see someone articulate, composed, visible, and you think, that must be amazing to be born like that, to be naturally confident.
In my recent conversation with Tara LaFon Gooch, TEDx speaker and author, we challenged that idea completely. Her perspective is clear- confidence is not a personality trait, it is not reserved for the naturally extroverted or the visibly charismatic. It is something you can build.
And more importantly, it is the foundation of your leadership.
Stop Chasing Success, Start Building Confidence
One of the most powerful ideas Tara shared is that many of us are chasing success, when in fact, success is the byproduct of your confidence.
When your confidence grows, your perceived competence grows. When perceived competence grows, trust increases. And when trust increases, your opportunities follow.
This shift in thinking matters. Instead of asking, ‘How do I become more successful?’, the more powerful question is, ‘How do I build sustainable confidence?’
The GRASP Framework for Confidence
Tara’s GRASP framework provides a practical roadmap:
- Gratitude
- Responsibility
- Action
- Sight
- Purpose
Gratitude- The Foundation
Most people associate gratitude with external circumstances. Be grateful for your home, your work, and your family.
Tara reframes it. Start with gratitude for yourself:
Gratitude for who you were.
Gratitude for who you are.
Gratitude for who you are becoming.
This is not sentimental, it is neurological. Gratitude anchors you in the moment and helps rewire thinking patterns that undermine your confidence. You cannot build strong leadership on self- criticism, so this is turning your thinking around to recognise what you have already.
Responsibility- Self-Leadership First
You cannot lead a team of many before you lead a team of one, yourself. Confidence requires personal responsibility- taking ownership of your development, your reactions, and your choices.
Without responsibility and self-leadership, gratitude becomes passive. With it, gratitude becomes powerful.
Actions- Small and Compounded
Confidence is not built through dramatic gestures. It is built through your consistent, repeated action- one small improvement a day. An uncomfortable conversation you handled slightly better. A presentation you delivered with slightly more impact.
Compounded over time, those small actions can evolve your identity, and this is when confidence strengthens.
Sight- See What you Want
You cannot be what you cannot see.
Visualisation is not wishful thinking, it is rehearsal, and shapes how you show up. If you cannot see yourself as a confident leader, you will unconsciously limit your behaviour. So you have to be able to visualise yourself in full confidence.
Environment also sits here- you need to create the environment around you, the people and the physical space, to sustain your confidence.
Purpose- The North Star
Purpose is something that you are meant to reveal. Often, you could be so close to your natural strengths that you overlook them. The clues are frequently in what others reflect back to you in their feedback so spot the things that feel natural to you, but others highlight as impressive to them.
Confidence Looks Different for Everyone
There is no single version of confidence. For you, it could mean speaking on global stages, for some of you, having the courage to share an idea in a meeting. For others of you, it is about setting boundaries or stepping into leadership for the first time.
The common thread is self-trust.
Your Reflection Questions
What small action could you take this week to build your confidence?
Who am you becoming, and are you acting in alignment with your vision?
Your Next Steps
Do not wait for a surge of confidence before you act. Start with gratitude for yourself. Take one small action. Adjust your environment where possible. Clarify what you see for your future. Reconnect with purpose.
Confidence is not for a chosen few. It is not a personality lottery.
It is a practice.
And it is available to you too.
