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Why aren’t your meetings working?
I know so many professionals I meet feel stuck in too many meetings that take too much time, that create debate and frustration, and still don’t get to action and move things forward.
In this latest podcast episode, I’m joined by Mamie Kanfer Stewart, host of The Modern Manager podcast, author, executive coach and trainer who helps professionals successfully manage themselves and their teams, so everyone can be their best selves and do their best work.
Mamie brings a clear and practical perspective on why meetings often don’t work, and what to do differently, including defining the meeting purpose, one of the biggest mistakes leaders make in meetings, and how to reset the meeting culture.
Mamie is passionate about helping people thrive at work, and this highly practical conversation is for anyone who wants meetings to feel less draining and far more productive.
What you will learn in this episode:
- Why meetings so often feel frustrating, slow and unproductive
- The difference between meeting activities and meeting outcomes
- Why information sharing is usually a poor reason to hold a meeting
- The key reasons meetings are genuinely useful, including planning, decision-making and relationship building
- How to think about meetings as a cycle- before, during and after- rather than as a one-off event
- Why clear team expectations around meetings reduce friction
- How to close meetings to get to decisions, actions and accountability
Are you clear on the desired outcome for each of your meetings?
What expectations around meetings are assumed in your team rather than made explicit?
How often do your meetings end with genuine clarity on who is doing what by when?
Find out more:
Episode Overview:
Why Your Meetings Are Not Working, and What to Do Instead
‘I am stuck in too many meetings that aren’t getting anywhere.’
This is something I hear. The number and frequency of meetings feel overwhelming, time-consuming and often unproductive. Yet despite this frustration, the default response is still to add another meeting to the calendar.
In a recent conversation with Mamie Kanfer Stewart, host of The Modern Manager podcast, author, executive coach and trainer, we explored a simple but powerful shift. Meetings are not the problem themselves. The problem is how we are using them.
When used well, meetings can be one of the most valuable tools you have as a leader. When used poorly, they drain time, energy and momentum of not only you, but also of your whole team.
So where do you start?
Meetings are being used for the Wrong Purpose
One of the biggest insights from our discussion is that meetings have become the default space for all communication, particularly information sharing.
The reality is that most information does not need a meeting. Sitting in a room, or on a call, listening to updates is rarely the best use of time. It is passive, one-way communication, and is often forgotten quickly.
Instead, meetings should be used far more intentionally. There are a number of clear purposes where they add real value, including:
Making decisions
Planning and coordinating work
Aligning on priorities
Brainstorming ideas
Building relationships
Learning from others
When you start to filter your meetings through this lens, it becomes much easier to challenge what needs to stay and what can go.
The Shift from Activity to Outcome
Another common challenge is that many meetings are designed around activity rather than outcome.
You might have an agenda that says ‘discussion’, ‘review’ or ‘brainstorm’, but that does not tell people what the meeting is there to achieve.
Without a clear outcome, it is very difficult for a meeting to feel productive.
A simple but powerful shift is to define a desired outcome for every meeting. What specifically should be different at the end of the time together?
For example:
A decision has been made
A plan has been agreed
A problem has been resolved
If you cannot answer that question, it is worth challenging whether the meeting is needed at all.
Meetings are not Events, they are a Process
One of the most useful reframes Mamie shared is that meetings are not a single moment in time, they are a process.
There are three distinct phases:
Before the meeting
This is where preparation happens. Sharing context, pre-reading, or key questions allows people to come ready to contribute, rather than using the meeting to catch up.
During the meeting
This is where collaboration happens. Not just talking, but using the time to think, decide and create together.
After the meeting
This is where momentum is built. Translating the conversation into clear actions, decisions and next steps.
When leaders only focus on what happens in the room, they miss two-thirds of the opportunity to make meetings effective.
The Role of Team Norms and Expectations
Another key theme in our conversation is that meetings are not just about structure, they are about behaviour.
Every team has unspoken assumptions about how meetings should work. For example, what does being on time for the meeting mean- a few minutes early, arrive exactly at the start time, or how late is it acceptable to arrive- what level of participation is expected, and even should cameras be on or off.
The challenge is that these assumptions are often different for each individual, and can be culturally driven.
Without clarity, this can create friction.
The solution is not to impose one ‘right’ way, but to discuss openly, agree and make expectations explicit. Agree as a team how you want your meetings to run, and revisit those agreements regularly.
This is particularly important in global and cross-cultural teams, where interpretations of time, communication and participation can vary significantly.
Ending Meetings with Clarity
One of the simplest and most powerful habits is how you end a meeting.
Too often, meetings close without clear direction and people leave with different interpretations of what was agreed, what happens next and who is doing what.
A strong close focuses on three things:
What decisions have been made
What actions need to happen
Who is responsible, and by when
This is where meetings move from conversation to progress.
Final Thoughts
Meetings do not have to be something people dread. When they are designed with intention, they can become one of the most energising and productive parts of the working day.
This is not about overhauling everything overnight, but it is about making small, deliberate shifts in how you approach them, and as a team leader, that starts with you.
Which meetings on your calendar genuinely add value, and which do not?
What is one change you could make this week to improve your meetings?
Next Steps
If this resonates, start small. Choose one meeting this week and redesign it. Be clear on the outcome, prepare differently, and close with clarity on next steps.
